Vicarious Resilience: The Key to Thriving as a Trauma Therapist

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You pour so much of yourself into this work. And I know how hard you’re working to build walls and guard yourself against the overwhelm, afraid of getting crushed by the weight of your clients’ stories. 

But what if the very thing you’re protecting yourself from holds the key to filling you back up?

Yes, this is a real thing and it’s called vicarious resilience—a powerful, yet not well known, renewable energy source for trauma therapists. It’s the fuel that keeps you going in your work but only if you know what it is, how to recognize it, and how to let it grow in your life.

The Origins of Vicarious Resilience

The story of how vicarious resilience was discovered is, in itself, a testament to the surprises that come with doing this work. In 2007, a research team led by Pilar Hernández set out to study trauma therapists working with survivors of torture. They expected to hear story after story about compassion fatigue, secondary traumatic stress, and the intense emotional toll of the work.

But what they found surprised them.

The therapists didn’t just talk about the hardships—they shared how their clients inspired them. They described leaving sessions feeling stronger and more hopeful, uplifted by witnessing their clients’ healing and resilience.

One therapist shared, “Most people, when I tell them that I work with torture survivors, think what a terrible, draining kind of work. And most often I will tell them it’s not unusual for me to get more from my clients than I give, because I’m often astonished again and again by most of the clients who come in.”

This was something entirely new. It didn’t have a name yet, but the researchers realized that trauma therapists were accessing resilience through their clients, much like we access trauma and stress through our work. 

And so, the concept of vicarious resilience was born!

The Dual Nature of Empathy: Vicarious Trauma and Vicarious Resilience

You cannot experience vicarious resilience without also experiencing vicarious trauma.

Full stop!

I’ll say it again - you can’t get one without the other.

This is because they both come from the same place — empathic engagement with your clients.

And I know, you’re trained to pull back and protect yourself when you feel vicarious trauma creeping in. You’ve been taught by professors, supervisors, and colleagues that “If I just build thicker walls, I won’t feel this as deeply.” 

And sure, that might work for a while. But there’s a cost to this kind of armoring up.

When you shut down to avoid the weight, you also shut yourself off from vicarious resilience. 

You block all the beautiful glimmers available to you in every single session. These are the moments that remind you why you do this work in the first place. In trying to avoid the hard stuff, you miss out on the very thing that can fill you back up.

If you remember only one thing from this blog post let it be this - 

• The path to vicarious resilience is through connection. Yes, that’s how you experience vicarious trauma too, but light doesn’t exist without dark.

• Vicarious resilience is experienced when you engage deeply, feel deeply, and allow yourself to be present for your clients’ healing. This is when you also get to be renewed.

Recognizing Vicarious Resilience in Everyday Work

Vicarious resilience doesn’t always show up in grand, life-changing moments with your clients. In fact, if you want to learn how to access it every day in your work as a trauma therapist, know that it’s usually very subtle.

• It’s a client setting a boundary they’ve never set before. 

• Someone smiling in session for the first time in weeks, or allowing themselves to finally cry. 

• It’s that moment when a client reconnects with a part of themselves they thought they lost.

I remember one session where a client with a lifetime of feeling worthless shared something they were proud of—a small, super tiny, step forward. It was a moment of such quiet strength that it caught me off guard.  And if I weren’t already aware of vicarious resilience, I would have totally missed  the tension in my own shoulders ease as I recognized their growth. 

These moments aren’t always flashy, but they leave an imprint.

If we’re not paying attention, though, they’re easy to miss! That’s why it’s so important to take even a moment after a session or at the end of the day to pause and reflect.

Practical Reflections: Your Path to Vicarious Resilience

To help you start recognizing and enhancing vicarious resilience in your daily work, here are some small, practical steps:

• Pause and Reflect: At the end of your day or session, ask yourself: What moment of resilience did I witness today? How did it feel in my body?

• Write It Down: Keep a journal or use a guided tool to document these glimmers. Over time, these small reflections build up and serve as powerful reminders.

• Get Back to Basics: Do something you know will help you feel more grounded, calm, or connected. Don’t reinvent the wheel when you have tools that already work.

To make this easier, I’ve created a free Vicarious Resilience Tracker for you that will help you first learn what vicarious resilience is like in your own brain and body so that you can start to pick up on all the big and small moments throughout your work.

You can download it here and never hesitate to reach out for support as you start using it.

Staying Open: Your Key to Vicarious Resilience

Staying open and human in our work is what makes vicarious resilience possible. Yes, it means feeling the hard parts, too, but without openness, you miss out on all the hope, progress, and transformation that keep us coming back to this work.

Let’s choose to notice those glimmers. 

Let’s choose connection over protection. 

And let’s remember that being human is our greatest strength.